I spoke about alcoholic beverages in Vietnam, but not the non-alcoholic drinks. Which I think are more interesting and with a greater variety.
Sinh To: One of my earliest posts is about sinh to, I will not go further about this, but I will mention you can get this at a coffee house or on the street. Many flavors of fruit and vegetables are available. But making it at home is better than on the street. But it is best on a hot night after a good meal. The best flavor is a balance of sweet, sour, creamy, cold, and smooth.
Nuoc Ep: It is a fancy term for juice. Most of the time it is the same flavors as sinh to, but not as sweet, rich, or cold.
Nuoc Mia: Sugarcane juice, this is addictive, especially with a small bit of pineapple or lime to squeeze with it, making it slightly sour. It should always be fresh, for it ferments/goes off quite quickly. So when you order a glass of sugarcane juice you will watch the vendor squeeze the juice out of the sugarcane right in front of you. An absolute must at least twice when you visit Vietnam.
Rau Ma: Pennywort drink. Very healthy, but....well to me it tastes like a drink of green beans. I like eating them, but not drinking. The health benefits are great though.
Coffee: Vietnamese coffee is known to be one of the best in the world (much to the chagrin of the Brazillians). The filter method of Vietnamese coffee leaves it thick and strong in flavor, one shot makes a shot of cappucino pale in comparison. To make it weaker to drink, many Vietnamese will pour it over ice in a large mug. To add flavor and sweetness, the coffee will be mixed with condensed milk (most common), yoghurt, or Baileys. I warn you that one mug is enough, two will more than likely upset your stomach.
Tea: Vietnamese tea borrows many flavors from China. But modern style bubble tea houses that was made popular in Taiwan. One of the more traditional Vietnamese teas is artichoke tea, where all artichokes come from a mountainous area famous for fruits, vegetables, flowers, and romance (Da Lat). The traditional ceremony is less structured or formal as the Chinese or Japanese tea ritual, the only importance is the elders are served first. How to drink it and when is not so important. But tea is seen as a simple luxury for everybody. One of the experiences I was not familiar with was called fresh tea, where the tea is made from fresh tea leaves, not dried. It is a bit more complicated to make and water temperatures and steeping is a little more difficult to minimize the bitter flavor.
Yoghurt: The most common form of a yoghurt drink is yoghurt mixed with ice, sugar, and fruit. The melting ice thins out the yoghurt and the fruit adds a nice flavor (usually strawberries).
Sua Bap: Corn milk, I don't know how it is made and we asked and they don't reveal their secrets. It is sold in reused water bottles, it looks like a yellowish milk. But when you drink it tastes...well...like sweet corn. Worth a try if you like corn.
Soy milk: It is much better than what you had from the health food store. They add sugar and flavor to make it edible. So try it again, I personally like it mixed with black sesame seed for a great flavor. In the north and in the mountains, to warm up, they serve it hot. But remember to get it fresh.
Coconut juice: This is common in Vietnam and people on bikes or carts will wander the streets and sell fresh young coconuts. Some vendors will have them in ice to make the juice cold, but that is rare. It is best to get a few, store in ice or in the fridge and have a nice treat later. I won't mention coconut milk as a drink, because it is meant to make and serve with desserts.
Bird's Nest Drink: This is a drink made from the nest of a swallow. It is only served in a can and there are a few companies that make it. It is believed to be very healthy, but it's flavor or the treatment of swallows, may cause many not to drink this drink.
I hope this helps, going to Vietnam means much more than seeing sights and eat some food, but having a good drink while wandering around.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Travel in HCMC and Vietnam
Traveling in HCMC
In HCMC there are many ways to travel. But public transport is not as easy or accessible as it is in Bangkok, Singapore, and Hong Kong.
Taxi
This is a standard in almost every city. There are many taxi companies along with counterfeit taxi cabs. Many taxis will have a meter, but there will be several rates depending on location and how foreign you look....in short the taxi driver will overcharge you.
Only Vinasun and Mailinh taxi companies do not overcharge for any reason. The drivers are well trained and fair. But because of this there are many independents that counterfeit the taxi cabs exploiting the reputation. I have seen Vinasum and Mailim taxi cabs. The best way to look is not only the name, because even less legitimate cab counterfeits will have the same name. The details to look for are phone numbers and dress of the taxi driver. Mailinh and Vinasun have set phone numbers, if you know the phone number than it is obvious. But as a tourist, you will not have the phone number memorized. So the other detail is the dress of the driver. The Vinasun and the Mailinh taxi driver is paid a bit better than other drivers and because of this they have higher uniform standards, and in this uniform is a tie. If given a preference, the Vietnamese man will not wear a tie. The driver of a counterfeit cab will not wear the tie or take it off when he leaves the garage and the watchful eye of his supervisors.
An average taxi drive should never cost you too much money. It should cost about $10 to cross town.
Bus
The city bus system is fast, cheap, and efficient. The buses are a bit old, but they are all air conditioned. But because of the heavy traffic and the schedules, it may seem a bit crazy for you. Many times there is not enough room or space for a bus to pull over, so you may have to get out in the middle of traffic. And if you are young, the bus may not really stop, just slowly roll, so you must run and jump on the bus. But the cost of the bus is about 15 cents. So it is hard to complain.
During rush hour (aka peak traffic), the buses wil be crowded, but the bus lines wil compensate by having two buses on the route instead of one. But even then you may not get a seat and have to stand. Another problem with a bus is that if you don't know where to get off, and know the exact route, then you will have problems. Unlike many other buses where you will get off the front door, in HCMC you will get off the middle or second door. You stand near the door to signal you want off the and driver will pull over, again if you are young(ish) you will only get a rolling stop.
Xe Om
Xe om is Vietnamese for a motormike taxi. These drivers are all over HCMC and if there is just one of you, it can be much, much cheaper and faster. But you have to negotiate the price. The cost of going across town is about $2.50. But if you have any emotional problems about riding a motorbike, forbidden from riding on something with only two wheels or easily scared, then the xe om is not for you. But if you want a true Vietnamese experience, you must ride one of these at least once in your life.
Traveling in Vietnam
Van Rental
You can rent a van and a driver. You can arrange this option for a road trip where there is a large group of people involved. The problem is that there is one driver, and if you decide that you want to travel overnight, then be aware that around 4 am your driver will be falling asleep and may cause an accident also. So if you are with a group that wants to travel overnight with one driver, just refuse. The rented van is comfortable for about four hours at most. After that, find another form of transportation.
Bus
The travel bus has two forms, the seat and the sleeper. The seat is a comfortable and cheap form of travel. The other option that is a bit more expensive called the sleeper bus. You will get in a seat the reclines and you travel overnight so you can sleep as you travel.
The main problem with this form of travel is the length of time it takes to get from one part to another. The infrastructure of Vietnam is still developing and the road system is not efficient. There are no highways, thus you have to travel through municipal areas and the speed limit will rarely exceed 50 mph. Because of this a trip to Da Lat is about 280 miles and it will take 8 hours to get there. The cost for a trip like this is about $5.
Plane
Plane is the quickest form of travel, and it is best and quickest and most comfortable. But the downside is the expense. It will cost you $50 to $70 to travel from one part of Vietnam to another. Thankfully there will be an addition to budget airlines and it will open up routes and lower costs for you to travel.
Last Point
Remember that Vietnam is still developing and the infrastructure of the cities and nation are not up to the standards that you will see in many other countries (even other developing nations such as China and Thailand). An extra ounce of patience and planning is needed for travel in Vietnam.
In HCMC there are many ways to travel. But public transport is not as easy or accessible as it is in Bangkok, Singapore, and Hong Kong.
Taxi
This is a standard in almost every city. There are many taxi companies along with counterfeit taxi cabs. Many taxis will have a meter, but there will be several rates depending on location and how foreign you look....in short the taxi driver will overcharge you.
Only Vinasun and Mailinh taxi companies do not overcharge for any reason. The drivers are well trained and fair. But because of this there are many independents that counterfeit the taxi cabs exploiting the reputation. I have seen Vinasum and Mailim taxi cabs. The best way to look is not only the name, because even less legitimate cab counterfeits will have the same name. The details to look for are phone numbers and dress of the taxi driver. Mailinh and Vinasun have set phone numbers, if you know the phone number than it is obvious. But as a tourist, you will not have the phone number memorized. So the other detail is the dress of the driver. The Vinasun and the Mailinh taxi driver is paid a bit better than other drivers and because of this they have higher uniform standards, and in this uniform is a tie. If given a preference, the Vietnamese man will not wear a tie. The driver of a counterfeit cab will not wear the tie or take it off when he leaves the garage and the watchful eye of his supervisors.
An average taxi drive should never cost you too much money. It should cost about $10 to cross town.
Bus
The city bus system is fast, cheap, and efficient. The buses are a bit old, but they are all air conditioned. But because of the heavy traffic and the schedules, it may seem a bit crazy for you. Many times there is not enough room or space for a bus to pull over, so you may have to get out in the middle of traffic. And if you are young, the bus may not really stop, just slowly roll, so you must run and jump on the bus. But the cost of the bus is about 15 cents. So it is hard to complain.
During rush hour (aka peak traffic), the buses wil be crowded, but the bus lines wil compensate by having two buses on the route instead of one. But even then you may not get a seat and have to stand. Another problem with a bus is that if you don't know where to get off, and know the exact route, then you will have problems. Unlike many other buses where you will get off the front door, in HCMC you will get off the middle or second door. You stand near the door to signal you want off the and driver will pull over, again if you are young(ish) you will only get a rolling stop.
Xe Om
Xe om is Vietnamese for a motormike taxi. These drivers are all over HCMC and if there is just one of you, it can be much, much cheaper and faster. But you have to negotiate the price. The cost of going across town is about $2.50. But if you have any emotional problems about riding a motorbike, forbidden from riding on something with only two wheels or easily scared, then the xe om is not for you. But if you want a true Vietnamese experience, you must ride one of these at least once in your life.
Traveling in Vietnam
Van Rental
You can rent a van and a driver. You can arrange this option for a road trip where there is a large group of people involved. The problem is that there is one driver, and if you decide that you want to travel overnight, then be aware that around 4 am your driver will be falling asleep and may cause an accident also. So if you are with a group that wants to travel overnight with one driver, just refuse. The rented van is comfortable for about four hours at most. After that, find another form of transportation.
Bus
The travel bus has two forms, the seat and the sleeper. The seat is a comfortable and cheap form of travel. The other option that is a bit more expensive called the sleeper bus. You will get in a seat the reclines and you travel overnight so you can sleep as you travel.
The main problem with this form of travel is the length of time it takes to get from one part to another. The infrastructure of Vietnam is still developing and the road system is not efficient. There are no highways, thus you have to travel through municipal areas and the speed limit will rarely exceed 50 mph. Because of this a trip to Da Lat is about 280 miles and it will take 8 hours to get there. The cost for a trip like this is about $5.
Plane
Plane is the quickest form of travel, and it is best and quickest and most comfortable. But the downside is the expense. It will cost you $50 to $70 to travel from one part of Vietnam to another. Thankfully there will be an addition to budget airlines and it will open up routes and lower costs for you to travel.
Last Point
Remember that Vietnam is still developing and the infrastructure of the cities and nation are not up to the standards that you will see in many other countries (even other developing nations such as China and Thailand). An extra ounce of patience and planning is needed for travel in Vietnam.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Why I Decided to Stay in Vietnam
I put many posts warning travelers about being careful in Vietnam and all the potential problems a person can face. I have probably scared you away. Now I will tell you the reasons, other than my fiancee, why I am staying in Vietnam.
Friendly People
The Vietnamese are exceptionally friendly. They are willing to help and assist you, especially a foreigner as best they can. My fiancee has given assistance to many foreigners without a second thought, just because she knew enough English to make everything easier. I have seen this with many Vietnamese. They understand the strength of tourism and try to promote it as much as possible.
In many other big cities when you are walking around people will come up to you and speak English to beg for money. In Vietnam they come up and speak English just to practice English with a foreigner. When you walk down the streets, you will get large groups of people saying "hello" and laughing afterwards, if you don't mind minor interruptions of friendliness, then it is quite enjoyable.
Food
Vietnamese food is brilliantly good. The majority of the food is not as complicated as some other cuisines (specifically the royal Asian cuisines). The Royal Vietnamese cuisine almost died out due to many reasons, but it is finding a resugance with a few people that learned how to cook for the long dead royals many years ago.
Vietnamese food has become so strong that the word pho (pronounced fuh) has become an English word (the definition has changed from a specific type of Vietnamese noodle/broth dish to all Vietnamese noodle/broth dishes).
But there are many more dishes which I will describe later.
Striving for a Better Future
This is something I noticed in China, Cambodia, and Vietnam. Everybody strives to be better as a person. The country strives to be better, they want to be better. That is something that disappeared in the USA many years ago. We lost it when the Cold War ended, no one to compete against, no challenge, no competition. Americans have lost the edge, it is the best...but what does that mean. And now that we don't know what it means to be the best anymore, we have lost our direction for the future.
Simplistic
The Vietnamese enjoy simple over complex, they enjoy concrete ideas over complicated and intricate ideas. And you see this repeated over and over again in their culture. Their art may be difficult and intricate but the image is very simple and direct. The food is nothing using expensive, just exploiting the best flavors available. The simple dress and clothing style is evident and practical. The most complicated is the ao dai (I will cover that idea later and explore that concept also).
Focus on the Family
The focus on culture is family over personal. As I stated before, if the parents request something from a child, their opinion whether it is good or bad is not a factor. But remember this, when a girl marries into a family, she becomes part of your family. Demands from her parents are options that you will follow, demands from your parents (as the husband) are commands.
Religious But Not Fanatical
The fanaticism that I see all over the world for religion scares me, scares me alot. Watching the few extremist Muslims and Christians scaring the world and may take the world to a war that no one can win. Watching hatred and ignorance in the name of religion (whose foundations and messages are contrary to these statements and actions) makes me angry, upset and scared.
The Buddhists and Catholics are very understanding and accepting about people and their faith. They don't strive to convert or censor you because your beliefs are different. They are fearful of Muslims, sadly, because there are very few in Vietnam and the media is infamous for painting a poor image of the Muslims. I would like to see a movie of a devout Muslim being a hero, not a victim, not a monster, but a hero. There are many heroes, humanitarians, and great people in the world and their religion is not a factor, but the message they learned compels them to be this great person. I have never hear anyone claim a person or a faith as Satanic or evil. The Vietnamese language does not even have Satan or paganism in the language. They do have words for devils and demons, but they are viewed as archaic things of superstition.
Focus on Education
Education is a valuable in the Vietnamese culture. They have morality tales about regret about not being good at school. They actually observe teacher's day where the teacher gets gifts of food, money, and more than likely a free meal out of it. One of the most respected positions is to be a teacher. But sadly the pay does not reflect the respect.
They also respect intellectuals as long as you are not pompous and down to earth about your knowledge.
A Few Surreal Moments
Watching the dragonflies come out after a large rainstorm and hover like a cloud over the green grass.
Driving through torrential rain in one part of the city and two minutes later to be in another part that is hot and dry with no rain at all.
Being treated like a minor celebrity at a dinner party or wedding because you are a foreigner.
The beautiful flower displays during the flower festival in Da Lat. (I will explore Da Lat later, a place that is ignored by foreign tourists, but loved by the Vietnamese)
Watching an entire city virtually shut down for two weeks a year for Vietnamese New Year.
The lazy jazz band backed by Chinese percussion playing Christmas songs before Christmas mass.
The smell of flowers, incense and burnt paper permeating the air on the first day of Vietnamese New Year.
Friendly People
The Vietnamese are exceptionally friendly. They are willing to help and assist you, especially a foreigner as best they can. My fiancee has given assistance to many foreigners without a second thought, just because she knew enough English to make everything easier. I have seen this with many Vietnamese. They understand the strength of tourism and try to promote it as much as possible.
In many other big cities when you are walking around people will come up to you and speak English to beg for money. In Vietnam they come up and speak English just to practice English with a foreigner. When you walk down the streets, you will get large groups of people saying "hello" and laughing afterwards, if you don't mind minor interruptions of friendliness, then it is quite enjoyable.
Food
Vietnamese food is brilliantly good. The majority of the food is not as complicated as some other cuisines (specifically the royal Asian cuisines). The Royal Vietnamese cuisine almost died out due to many reasons, but it is finding a resugance with a few people that learned how to cook for the long dead royals many years ago.
Vietnamese food has become so strong that the word pho (pronounced fuh) has become an English word (the definition has changed from a specific type of Vietnamese noodle/broth dish to all Vietnamese noodle/broth dishes).
But there are many more dishes which I will describe later.
Striving for a Better Future
This is something I noticed in China, Cambodia, and Vietnam. Everybody strives to be better as a person. The country strives to be better, they want to be better. That is something that disappeared in the USA many years ago. We lost it when the Cold War ended, no one to compete against, no challenge, no competition. Americans have lost the edge, it is the best...but what does that mean. And now that we don't know what it means to be the best anymore, we have lost our direction for the future.
Simplistic
The Vietnamese enjoy simple over complex, they enjoy concrete ideas over complicated and intricate ideas. And you see this repeated over and over again in their culture. Their art may be difficult and intricate but the image is very simple and direct. The food is nothing using expensive, just exploiting the best flavors available. The simple dress and clothing style is evident and practical. The most complicated is the ao dai (I will cover that idea later and explore that concept also).
Focus on the Family
The focus on culture is family over personal. As I stated before, if the parents request something from a child, their opinion whether it is good or bad is not a factor. But remember this, when a girl marries into a family, she becomes part of your family. Demands from her parents are options that you will follow, demands from your parents (as the husband) are commands.
Religious But Not Fanatical
The fanaticism that I see all over the world for religion scares me, scares me alot. Watching the few extremist Muslims and Christians scaring the world and may take the world to a war that no one can win. Watching hatred and ignorance in the name of religion (whose foundations and messages are contrary to these statements and actions) makes me angry, upset and scared.
The Buddhists and Catholics are very understanding and accepting about people and their faith. They don't strive to convert or censor you because your beliefs are different. They are fearful of Muslims, sadly, because there are very few in Vietnam and the media is infamous for painting a poor image of the Muslims. I would like to see a movie of a devout Muslim being a hero, not a victim, not a monster, but a hero. There are many heroes, humanitarians, and great people in the world and their religion is not a factor, but the message they learned compels them to be this great person. I have never hear anyone claim a person or a faith as Satanic or evil. The Vietnamese language does not even have Satan or paganism in the language. They do have words for devils and demons, but they are viewed as archaic things of superstition.
Focus on Education
Education is a valuable in the Vietnamese culture. They have morality tales about regret about not being good at school. They actually observe teacher's day where the teacher gets gifts of food, money, and more than likely a free meal out of it. One of the most respected positions is to be a teacher. But sadly the pay does not reflect the respect.
They also respect intellectuals as long as you are not pompous and down to earth about your knowledge.
A Few Surreal Moments
Watching the dragonflies come out after a large rainstorm and hover like a cloud over the green grass.
Driving through torrential rain in one part of the city and two minutes later to be in another part that is hot and dry with no rain at all.
Being treated like a minor celebrity at a dinner party or wedding because you are a foreigner.
The beautiful flower displays during the flower festival in Da Lat. (I will explore Da Lat later, a place that is ignored by foreign tourists, but loved by the Vietnamese)
Watching an entire city virtually shut down for two weeks a year for Vietnamese New Year.
The lazy jazz band backed by Chinese percussion playing Christmas songs before Christmas mass.
The smell of flowers, incense and burnt paper permeating the air on the first day of Vietnamese New Year.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Paperwork for Marriage
One of the most trying things for people is paperwork. If you are going to be married in Vietnam, you will have a lot of paperwork and about one month in time and some money.
First off the paperwork you will need will differ from province/city the Vietnamese citizen comes from. HCMC is the most lax compared to other provinces.
The Bulk of the Paperwork
Both of you will need a medical check up at an approved hospital, and if you are a non-Asian, the cost will be higher. It is a simple blood check, overview/review with a doctor, etc. Nothing detailed nothing problematic. A further check is needed if you are French, but I am unsure what exactly that entails since I am not French.
You both will need a piece of paper declaring your status that you are single. You may need to get it from the state government you are from and not the consulate/embassy of your nation. The single status paperwork, then needs to be translated and stamped/approved by the Ministry of External/Foreign Affairs.
Your passport will need to be photocopied with every stamp and be stamped by the local authority. The Vietnamese citizen needs their family red book photocopied and approved/stamped and their government identification card photocopied and approved/stamped.
You will fill out a CV (depending on the requirements of the provincial government) and a profile with passport size photos.
After filling out all paperwork, you submit it to the proper authorities (Ministry of Justice) along with a set amount of money. They will give you a piece of paper for an interview.
The Interview
For the interview you will need a translator unless you speak Mandarin or Korean (according to the statement on our sheet of paper, your sheet of paper may be different). Find a good translator who is nice and a bit charming. They will ask questions about where you met, what you have done, details about family. And a few times they may ask for some extra money to make things quick or approved (it is up to you, you don't have to pay). They will then submit the interview information and wait. They may ask for further information, pictures, plane tickets, and other things to prove your information/story.
After the Interview
You will have to come back in another two weeks to see if you are approved.
Once you are approved, in four to five weeks you will get your marriage certificate. The marriage certificate means you are approved by the government to get married. Double check all information, because your information is foreign, mistakes may happen. Sign and get your piece of paper. Cover it in plastic (at a local photocopy shop) and also get official government copies ordered at the Ministry of Justice at the same time.
Benefits of the Vietnamese Marriage Certificate
You can be officially married by a church. The Catholic Church will ask for more paperwork (proof of your Christianity, her visa if you are moving to another country, or proof you are staying in Vietnam, plus paperwork you went through marriage lessons). You can get a visa exemption stamp, it is a five year stamp that you renew every three months that replaces all other visas. This stamp and the renewals are significantly cheaper than a tourist/business visa.
You can also reside legally in a house that is in your spouse's name (rented or owned). Before that you have to reside in a home that is governmentally approved for foreigners and the contract maximum is three months (and usually more expensive to rent).
This is also the first step to get you a work permit, temporary residence card, and eventually dual citizenship.
The work permit needs: a letter of invitation/contract from a business, an authorized diploma, a government criminal background check and a health check.
Temporary residence needs: a work permit, relation (marriage, parent, child of VN citizen), a house (owned not rented), a health check, government criminal background check and proof of reasonable income from spouse (she or he has to make enough to provide for you if you are unemployed).
Passport/dual citizenship: almost the same as the temporary residence, along with the temporary residence card.
The most difficult thing about the paperwork is that it has a 6 month life, so find out how long it takes for everything. For example, the criminal background check is approx 5 weeks, but it will take longer because of information from the foreign nation. Your diploma approval is dependant on the nation you graduated from (ie: AU is 2 weeks, and the USA is about 2 months, AU has a central database that can be done overseas, the USA is dependent on the state so you have to send your diploma to the state you graduated from). The health check takes one week of processing after 4 hours of testing. And this is compiled with the letter of offer (most than likely the company will have a template with the blank date to ensure all is done well). The big problem is with being a teacher in an overseas country is that you have to get approval from both the Ministry of Labor and the Ministry of Education. Sometimes a lawyer can help, but most of the time they are expensive and sometimes give false information. If you have the time and the patience, you can do it yourself. As with most paperwork with the VN government.
First off the paperwork you will need will differ from province/city the Vietnamese citizen comes from. HCMC is the most lax compared to other provinces.
The Bulk of the Paperwork
Both of you will need a medical check up at an approved hospital, and if you are a non-Asian, the cost will be higher. It is a simple blood check, overview/review with a doctor, etc. Nothing detailed nothing problematic. A further check is needed if you are French, but I am unsure what exactly that entails since I am not French.
You both will need a piece of paper declaring your status that you are single. You may need to get it from the state government you are from and not the consulate/embassy of your nation. The single status paperwork, then needs to be translated and stamped/approved by the Ministry of External/Foreign Affairs.
Your passport will need to be photocopied with every stamp and be stamped by the local authority. The Vietnamese citizen needs their family red book photocopied and approved/stamped and their government identification card photocopied and approved/stamped.
You will fill out a CV (depending on the requirements of the provincial government) and a profile with passport size photos.
After filling out all paperwork, you submit it to the proper authorities (Ministry of Justice) along with a set amount of money. They will give you a piece of paper for an interview.
The Interview
For the interview you will need a translator unless you speak Mandarin or Korean (according to the statement on our sheet of paper, your sheet of paper may be different). Find a good translator who is nice and a bit charming. They will ask questions about where you met, what you have done, details about family. And a few times they may ask for some extra money to make things quick or approved (it is up to you, you don't have to pay). They will then submit the interview information and wait. They may ask for further information, pictures, plane tickets, and other things to prove your information/story.
After the Interview
You will have to come back in another two weeks to see if you are approved.
Once you are approved, in four to five weeks you will get your marriage certificate. The marriage certificate means you are approved by the government to get married. Double check all information, because your information is foreign, mistakes may happen. Sign and get your piece of paper. Cover it in plastic (at a local photocopy shop) and also get official government copies ordered at the Ministry of Justice at the same time.
Benefits of the Vietnamese Marriage Certificate
You can be officially married by a church. The Catholic Church will ask for more paperwork (proof of your Christianity, her visa if you are moving to another country, or proof you are staying in Vietnam, plus paperwork you went through marriage lessons). You can get a visa exemption stamp, it is a five year stamp that you renew every three months that replaces all other visas. This stamp and the renewals are significantly cheaper than a tourist/business visa.
You can also reside legally in a house that is in your spouse's name (rented or owned). Before that you have to reside in a home that is governmentally approved for foreigners and the contract maximum is three months (and usually more expensive to rent).
This is also the first step to get you a work permit, temporary residence card, and eventually dual citizenship.
The work permit needs: a letter of invitation/contract from a business, an authorized diploma, a government criminal background check and a health check.
Temporary residence needs: a work permit, relation (marriage, parent, child of VN citizen), a house (owned not rented), a health check, government criminal background check and proof of reasonable income from spouse (she or he has to make enough to provide for you if you are unemployed).
Passport/dual citizenship: almost the same as the temporary residence, along with the temporary residence card.
The most difficult thing about the paperwork is that it has a 6 month life, so find out how long it takes for everything. For example, the criminal background check is approx 5 weeks, but it will take longer because of information from the foreign nation. Your diploma approval is dependant on the nation you graduated from (ie: AU is 2 weeks, and the USA is about 2 months, AU has a central database that can be done overseas, the USA is dependent on the state so you have to send your diploma to the state you graduated from). The health check takes one week of processing after 4 hours of testing. And this is compiled with the letter of offer (most than likely the company will have a template with the blank date to ensure all is done well). The big problem is with being a teacher in an overseas country is that you have to get approval from both the Ministry of Labor and the Ministry of Education. Sometimes a lawyer can help, but most of the time they are expensive and sometimes give false information. If you have the time and the patience, you can do it yourself. As with most paperwork with the VN government.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Clothing and Suggested Clothing for the Wedding Feast
The last blog was long....almost too long....and I should just take away the 'almost'.
I will break down the ceremonies, what I will wear, what Tram will wear. And in brief what you should wear.
In General
A light t-shirt, shorts, sandals, a hat, and sunglasses. For some of you it will be hot, for others it will be comfortable. The rainy season is done, so there is a small chance of rain, don't worry about getting wet or bringing rain gear. Don't bring a coat or sweater (unless you live in North America, use it for the plane trip to and from). If you are from the USA and coming to Vietnam, bring a change of clothes and change during your layover (or be insane and dress for the destination during the plane trip, not for your current location).
Other things to bring, beach wear (shirt and shorts that will get wet at the beach and affected by salt water. My standard wear is shorts and a t-shirt and sandals, for government paperwork an untucked button down shirt and trousers, and for teaching a nice button down shirt, wingtips, trousers and a tie.
Asking the Bride's Family Permission to Marry
I will be wearing gray trousers, a gray tie, and a red shirt. Tram will be wearing a formal ao dai that is traditional. If you are a 'Brother', a 'Sister' or part of the family in the ceremony, I suggest trousers, shirt, shoes, and a tie if you are a man, and if you are a woman, I suggest an ao dai for the younger women, and either an ao dai or something formal yet light and comfortable for the elder women.
The Wedding
This will occur at a Catholic Church near Tram's family's house. I will be wearing a black suit, black tie, and a white shirt with a fun pattern on it. She will be wearing a western style formal white wedding dress, we are currently hunting the dress that she will wear.
As for guests, wear a button down shirt, trousers, and shoes for a man (a tie is not needed unless you are direct family). Women can wear something semi-formal and very comfortable, remember it is going to be warm.
The Introduction of the Bride to the Groom's House
I will wear a nice blue shirt, blue tie, and blue trousers (all different shades) along with black wingtips. Tram will be wearing the same ao dai as the previous day.
As for the witnesses and family, be semi formal, no ties, but collared shirts, closed toe shoes, and trousers are suggested for men. For women, a nice dress is suggested, or semi-formal.
The Reception
At the beginning, we will wear our outfits during the wedding when we welcome guests. Before the opening ceremony, we will change. Tram will change into a fun ao dai, and I will change to a lighter suit (the color is giong to be a blend of gray, light brown, and yellow....hard to describe, formal yet fun and practical).
As for guests. This is a moment to have fun, be formal. But wear something fun. I heard a rumor that a friend is going to wear a linen suit. I recently saw pictures of the Irish linen suit, and I am five shades of jealous, especially with a light purple shirt and a fun tie. Mix that suit with a straw boater and that is a great suit, that is formal, yet unstuffy and comfortable.
A Request
If you are a female and coming to our wedding and you are interested in ao dai. Please contact us, we will try to get one made for you ahead of time. We will need a long list of measurements, and we will discuss styles. If you show up and want one here, then we can get the fabric and have it made as quickly as possible, but it will be simple in style and not complex.
Here is a link to ao dai styles. This will give you the general idea. The cost will be lower, but the cost will vary depending on materials and complexity of style.
As a prediction, I think that the ao dai will become more and more popular to wear among Asian women all over the world. It has several styles and there are several fashion designers who not only style the ao dai, but the fabric also. The popularity comes because it is form fitting, but you don't have to be super thin for it to look good on you. The long trousers can cover the shoes that the girl is wearing to make her look taller (at one show, a model was wearing shoes to add 15 cm on her, but the trousers covered the fact mostly. You had to look, and since she was on the runway, her feet were a bit below eye level.
I will break down the ceremonies, what I will wear, what Tram will wear. And in brief what you should wear.
In General
A light t-shirt, shorts, sandals, a hat, and sunglasses. For some of you it will be hot, for others it will be comfortable. The rainy season is done, so there is a small chance of rain, don't worry about getting wet or bringing rain gear. Don't bring a coat or sweater (unless you live in North America, use it for the plane trip to and from). If you are from the USA and coming to Vietnam, bring a change of clothes and change during your layover (or be insane and dress for the destination during the plane trip, not for your current location).
Other things to bring, beach wear (shirt and shorts that will get wet at the beach and affected by salt water. My standard wear is shorts and a t-shirt and sandals, for government paperwork an untucked button down shirt and trousers, and for teaching a nice button down shirt, wingtips, trousers and a tie.
Asking the Bride's Family Permission to Marry
I will be wearing gray trousers, a gray tie, and a red shirt. Tram will be wearing a formal ao dai that is traditional. If you are a 'Brother', a 'Sister' or part of the family in the ceremony, I suggest trousers, shirt, shoes, and a tie if you are a man, and if you are a woman, I suggest an ao dai for the younger women, and either an ao dai or something formal yet light and comfortable for the elder women.
The Wedding
This will occur at a Catholic Church near Tram's family's house. I will be wearing a black suit, black tie, and a white shirt with a fun pattern on it. She will be wearing a western style formal white wedding dress, we are currently hunting the dress that she will wear.
As for guests, wear a button down shirt, trousers, and shoes for a man (a tie is not needed unless you are direct family). Women can wear something semi-formal and very comfortable, remember it is going to be warm.
The Introduction of the Bride to the Groom's House
I will wear a nice blue shirt, blue tie, and blue trousers (all different shades) along with black wingtips. Tram will be wearing the same ao dai as the previous day.
As for the witnesses and family, be semi formal, no ties, but collared shirts, closed toe shoes, and trousers are suggested for men. For women, a nice dress is suggested, or semi-formal.
The Reception
At the beginning, we will wear our outfits during the wedding when we welcome guests. Before the opening ceremony, we will change. Tram will change into a fun ao dai, and I will change to a lighter suit (the color is giong to be a blend of gray, light brown, and yellow....hard to describe, formal yet fun and practical).
As for guests. This is a moment to have fun, be formal. But wear something fun. I heard a rumor that a friend is going to wear a linen suit. I recently saw pictures of the Irish linen suit, and I am five shades of jealous, especially with a light purple shirt and a fun tie. Mix that suit with a straw boater and that is a great suit, that is formal, yet unstuffy and comfortable.
A Request
If you are a female and coming to our wedding and you are interested in ao dai. Please contact us, we will try to get one made for you ahead of time. We will need a long list of measurements, and we will discuss styles. If you show up and want one here, then we can get the fabric and have it made as quickly as possible, but it will be simple in style and not complex.
Here is a link to ao dai styles. This will give you the general idea. The cost will be lower, but the cost will vary depending on materials and complexity of style.
As a prediction, I think that the ao dai will become more and more popular to wear among Asian women all over the world. It has several styles and there are several fashion designers who not only style the ao dai, but the fabric also. The popularity comes because it is form fitting, but you don't have to be super thin for it to look good on you. The long trousers can cover the shoes that the girl is wearing to make her look taller (at one show, a model was wearing shoes to add 15 cm on her, but the trousers covered the fact mostly. You had to look, and since she was on the runway, her feet were a bit below eye level.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Dating and Marriage
Okay, despite the fear, scams threats, and hullabaloo stated by the media and the innate fear of dating someone via the internet. It works. But don't expect to be 100% successful. It happens, but it comes with a healthy warning. Love and marriage will come to those who work at it. And remember there is a gut feeling about it.
Scams
There are sites that are scams: "pay us money and you can get the wife in the photo" (and the photos are all model quality women), women who are leeches (where they will have many men sending them money), men who are fraudulent (send him money and in return he will get the girl a visa), or the random bride selection.
The Repercussions
A Korean bride site matched a young Vietnamese bride to a Korean man with mental problems, she ended up being beaten and stabbed to death. Article here. A person can witness illegal or scam marriages in Ho Chi Minh City. We witnessed a group of Korean men and VN women going back to a hotel after marriage, it was a large group (about 12), it looked like it was hastily done, and they were in a rush for no one to see them. Because of this, it was surmised that this was an illegal marriage. Many men from other countries find themselves socially inadequate or undesireable in their home country to find an overseas bride looking for a better life.
So in many cases, women from developing countries are being lured into another country in promise of a good life, only to find a place with no support, no help, and in a worst situation. So women be careful.
But women aren't the only ones who should be careful. There are men who are not socially active, or desireable by women in his country (due to shyness, looks, etc.), become a target of affections by an attractive woman. You will chat with her and then the woman will come with a sob story of her being poor and needs money for her or her family. And the man, who in his heart is a 'White Knight', becomes her savior. But more than likely she is talking to many men and getting lots of money. For a promise of a few photos and words that these men want to hear. This can go quite far, the furthest is the sham marriage.
Sham marriages can occur for a woman to get entry into a foreign country where she has family. Or it is something more diabolical than getting past legal difficulties of xenophobic state departments stuck with Cold War mentalities. A man meets a girl from a foreign country, they fall in love quickly, and get married even more quickly, the bride arranges all the details. In SE Asia the tradition is for the man to give money to the bride's parents and gold to the wife in the symbol of thanking the parents for raising the daughter and gold to make sure that if things are financially tough later, they can sell the gold. The type of gold and the amount of money varies from country to country and family to family. Many western men find this repugnant because it is like buying a woman from the family (a form of slavery). The gold can be rented also, it is more symbolic, it should not be significantly large or excessive. If the request is excessive, then as a man, beware. Next a person can book and arrange for catering, entertainment, and flowers and not pay until after the wedding (thus a bride can collect money to pay for these things ahead of time), be careful if money is requested and there are no receipts. And lastly is the red envelopes, in Asian culture red envelopes with money in it is accepted, it helps pay for the wedding. And hopefully after the wedding is paid for there is enough money to help the bride and groom out for a honeymoon or a new house or whatever. Many times one has to ask who will collect and keep the red envelopes, because if family does it, more than likely the family will keep the money.
How can this be a scam?
If the gov't paperwork isn't finalized and the wedding is rushed: the gold, the cash (dowry) to parents, payments of services and goods, and the red envelopes will disappear along with the wife. And a man who that he is in love with a beautiful woman will find himself stuck in a foreign country with little money and broken hearted.
But before you can cluck your tongue and shake your head at the greediness of Asian women. I want to remind you of the women who will marry a rich man only to divorce him and get half of his assets.
Where do you find a nice Asian woman?
In all honesty, despite all the scams and problems, the man who get scammed the worse (as the wedding scenario) do not find a bride via the internet, but at a bar, poolhall, or coffeeshop. If you visit an Asian country and you are in the tourist area you find attractive women in these places. They will be attracted to you, but beware, these are not nice girls, nor do they have a reputation in their own country. Nice girls are usually not there. So how do you meet the nice girls. The nice girls are shy and sincere. They don't want to have a bad reputation by going or working at those places. So they can be courageous by going online.
Why do Asian women want to find a western man?
The reasons are varied why they are looking. More than likely a woman got treated poorly by a bad apple and they look beyond their own culture. So they look online. Plus in some nations, a mixed ethnicity child is considered attractive, smart, and will be successful. Many women in developing nations see men and life in another country as a paradise away from toil, poverty, and not having a family. They marry early in Asia, and if you wait too long, a woman could be considered unmarriable because she could not produce healthy children, or have the benefit of youth to raise them. Again we have many examples contrary to this, but many women do gain a better life.
Why do men want an Asian bride?
Many men in the west find it difficult to date a woman in countries like the USA, Australia, etc. Due to social awkwardness, not meeting set appearance guidelines, etc. He will look elsewhere. (I include myself in this category.) There are many reasons why women are much more selective in western countries (some blame feminism, I don't think that is a fact, even feminists want a mate). I blame the 49% male population to the 51% female population in developed nations. It means that men have to be more competitive to find a woman and many times a man can not find a girlfriend or wife. The percentage of women to men is much higher in developing nations. The exception to this is China, due to traditional values, the high male ratio is found specifically in the countryside not in the cities.
A man that gets no responses on a western dating site, will get many attractive Asian women contacting and chatting with him online. A person who can barely get a date in a western country (me), can have many girlfriends in Asia (me again). It just means getting enough courage to travel or live overseas. (More on that later.)
Are western women threatened by Asian women?
I am not sure about this fact, most of the evidence is anecdoctal. Where Asian women will get threatened by American women. Article here. The reasons of these threats are various: racism (different races shouldn't marry, or so they believe), jealousy (the exotic appearance and small stature, comparically), misconceptions (all the horror stories that the man is being duped and a nice guy is with an unfaithful woman), etc.
Before you label my statements as racist, or ignorant, evaluate your feelings about my marriage. Are you excited or hesitant, and if you are hesitant, ask yourself why. Would you be hesitant if I was marrying a white girl, or a girl from a western nation.
Now to reverse this, many Asian (from Asia) women are jealous and fearful of western women, to the point that they think if a western man has a choice between a white woman and an Asian woman, he will always choose a white woman.
What a western man should know before marrying a woman from Asia
Remember, in Asian culture, the group and the family is more important than the individual. So you are not just marrying a girl, you are also marrying into a family. The idea an Asian girl going against the wishes of the family is unimaginable and any request of the man to do so will make her miserable. So be aware of what the family is like, for they will influence your life and decisions for many years. As a man who wants to marry an Asian girl, you must realize this. But remember, she must balance the priority of being a daughter and being a wife. While she dates she is still a daughter and must obey all wishes of her family. After her marriage (part of the ceremony is her going from her household to your household) she becomes a member of your household, so her top priority is wife and daughter-in-law. But this is confused in many families (including Asian couples) where the wife's priority puts her parents and her siblings higher than you or your family. It is supposed to be the duty of the new daughter-in-law to be in charge of the house in a traditional household.
But many new issues arise which can add conflict when a girl marries a westerner or a male that is perceived to be wealthy. These are undesirable traits that occur and a man has to be careful, this will prove that you are a lower priority to her. Large sums of money disappear from your savings, when he questions it, he finds out she needed to loan money to family or friends in an emergency (with no thoughts of repayment). She prefers to be in her family home than yours, her family and friends abuse your hospitality by staying at your home and eating your food without any reimbursement of any kind.
How will the western man's family react to your marriage
I know of three western mothers of men who married an Asian woman. (I include my own mother to this, sorry mom, but these issues are going to be made public). Many families will react with hesitation because of fear. Fear because of misconceptions and the unknown.
Many misconceptions are: that the new bride will steal all your money, that the new mother-in-law will completely control your entire life, that the family is using you just as a paycheck, the new bride is controlling and is changing the way the son acts and interacts with his family, the new bride is just looking for a green card and will leave the man broken hearted and alone once she has the green card, etc.
Now not all the misconceptions will be unfounded. Many times your family is looking out for the best for you. But the best way to see what is going on is to make many friends in Asia and see how they react to your future bride, they will be much better judges, knowing what is culture (or cultural conflict) and what is not good. Many times the girl will act saintly around your family, but not around your friends, they may let something slip in their native language.
When should you get married?
Many times a marriage is forced because of pressures of family for a better life. The girl does not like the man, but because the family sees it as a paycheck, she will get into a loveless marriage. If you have any hesitations or problems, marriage will not cure them, marriage is not a cure to problems, it just hides them for awhile as both of you are busy getting ready for the wedding.
What problems will occur?
Most problems will occur due to cultural and language differences. Many times both the man and the woman in a couple will assume that their partner will react in a way similar to their culture and get upset when they do something different. You both have to accept and learn about each other's culture and way of life. Language will be another problem, since you and her will be speaking a second language, not all words or concepts of words will be exact. So what you say or what she says, may be upsetting. The solution is to be patient, speak slowly, and make sure everything is understood.
Any other problems occur because of your or her priority to the household, family, or work.
Again marriage or a child is not a solution, so if you think something like that will happen, then think again. If in doubt then don't do it.
Scams
There are sites that are scams: "pay us money and you can get the wife in the photo" (and the photos are all model quality women), women who are leeches (where they will have many men sending them money), men who are fraudulent (send him money and in return he will get the girl a visa), or the random bride selection.
The Repercussions
A Korean bride site matched a young Vietnamese bride to a Korean man with mental problems, she ended up being beaten and stabbed to death. Article here. A person can witness illegal or scam marriages in Ho Chi Minh City. We witnessed a group of Korean men and VN women going back to a hotel after marriage, it was a large group (about 12), it looked like it was hastily done, and they were in a rush for no one to see them. Because of this, it was surmised that this was an illegal marriage. Many men from other countries find themselves socially inadequate or undesireable in their home country to find an overseas bride looking for a better life.
So in many cases, women from developing countries are being lured into another country in promise of a good life, only to find a place with no support, no help, and in a worst situation. So women be careful.
But women aren't the only ones who should be careful. There are men who are not socially active, or desireable by women in his country (due to shyness, looks, etc.), become a target of affections by an attractive woman. You will chat with her and then the woman will come with a sob story of her being poor and needs money for her or her family. And the man, who in his heart is a 'White Knight', becomes her savior. But more than likely she is talking to many men and getting lots of money. For a promise of a few photos and words that these men want to hear. This can go quite far, the furthest is the sham marriage.
Sham marriages can occur for a woman to get entry into a foreign country where she has family. Or it is something more diabolical than getting past legal difficulties of xenophobic state departments stuck with Cold War mentalities. A man meets a girl from a foreign country, they fall in love quickly, and get married even more quickly, the bride arranges all the details. In SE Asia the tradition is for the man to give money to the bride's parents and gold to the wife in the symbol of thanking the parents for raising the daughter and gold to make sure that if things are financially tough later, they can sell the gold. The type of gold and the amount of money varies from country to country and family to family. Many western men find this repugnant because it is like buying a woman from the family (a form of slavery). The gold can be rented also, it is more symbolic, it should not be significantly large or excessive. If the request is excessive, then as a man, beware. Next a person can book and arrange for catering, entertainment, and flowers and not pay until after the wedding (thus a bride can collect money to pay for these things ahead of time), be careful if money is requested and there are no receipts. And lastly is the red envelopes, in Asian culture red envelopes with money in it is accepted, it helps pay for the wedding. And hopefully after the wedding is paid for there is enough money to help the bride and groom out for a honeymoon or a new house or whatever. Many times one has to ask who will collect and keep the red envelopes, because if family does it, more than likely the family will keep the money.
How can this be a scam?
If the gov't paperwork isn't finalized and the wedding is rushed: the gold, the cash (dowry) to parents, payments of services and goods, and the red envelopes will disappear along with the wife. And a man who that he is in love with a beautiful woman will find himself stuck in a foreign country with little money and broken hearted.
But before you can cluck your tongue and shake your head at the greediness of Asian women. I want to remind you of the women who will marry a rich man only to divorce him and get half of his assets.
Where do you find a nice Asian woman?
In all honesty, despite all the scams and problems, the man who get scammed the worse (as the wedding scenario) do not find a bride via the internet, but at a bar, poolhall, or coffeeshop. If you visit an Asian country and you are in the tourist area you find attractive women in these places. They will be attracted to you, but beware, these are not nice girls, nor do they have a reputation in their own country. Nice girls are usually not there. So how do you meet the nice girls. The nice girls are shy and sincere. They don't want to have a bad reputation by going or working at those places. So they can be courageous by going online.
Why do Asian women want to find a western man?
The reasons are varied why they are looking. More than likely a woman got treated poorly by a bad apple and they look beyond their own culture. So they look online. Plus in some nations, a mixed ethnicity child is considered attractive, smart, and will be successful. Many women in developing nations see men and life in another country as a paradise away from toil, poverty, and not having a family. They marry early in Asia, and if you wait too long, a woman could be considered unmarriable because she could not produce healthy children, or have the benefit of youth to raise them. Again we have many examples contrary to this, but many women do gain a better life.
Why do men want an Asian bride?
Many men in the west find it difficult to date a woman in countries like the USA, Australia, etc. Due to social awkwardness, not meeting set appearance guidelines, etc. He will look elsewhere. (I include myself in this category.) There are many reasons why women are much more selective in western countries (some blame feminism, I don't think that is a fact, even feminists want a mate). I blame the 49% male population to the 51% female population in developed nations. It means that men have to be more competitive to find a woman and many times a man can not find a girlfriend or wife. The percentage of women to men is much higher in developing nations. The exception to this is China, due to traditional values, the high male ratio is found specifically in the countryside not in the cities.
A man that gets no responses on a western dating site, will get many attractive Asian women contacting and chatting with him online. A person who can barely get a date in a western country (me), can have many girlfriends in Asia (me again). It just means getting enough courage to travel or live overseas. (More on that later.)
Are western women threatened by Asian women?
I am not sure about this fact, most of the evidence is anecdoctal. Where Asian women will get threatened by American women. Article here. The reasons of these threats are various: racism (different races shouldn't marry, or so they believe), jealousy (the exotic appearance and small stature, comparically), misconceptions (all the horror stories that the man is being duped and a nice guy is with an unfaithful woman), etc.
Before you label my statements as racist, or ignorant, evaluate your feelings about my marriage. Are you excited or hesitant, and if you are hesitant, ask yourself why. Would you be hesitant if I was marrying a white girl, or a girl from a western nation.
Now to reverse this, many Asian (from Asia) women are jealous and fearful of western women, to the point that they think if a western man has a choice between a white woman and an Asian woman, he will always choose a white woman.
What a western man should know before marrying a woman from Asia
Remember, in Asian culture, the group and the family is more important than the individual. So you are not just marrying a girl, you are also marrying into a family. The idea an Asian girl going against the wishes of the family is unimaginable and any request of the man to do so will make her miserable. So be aware of what the family is like, for they will influence your life and decisions for many years. As a man who wants to marry an Asian girl, you must realize this. But remember, she must balance the priority of being a daughter and being a wife. While she dates she is still a daughter and must obey all wishes of her family. After her marriage (part of the ceremony is her going from her household to your household) she becomes a member of your household, so her top priority is wife and daughter-in-law. But this is confused in many families (including Asian couples) where the wife's priority puts her parents and her siblings higher than you or your family. It is supposed to be the duty of the new daughter-in-law to be in charge of the house in a traditional household.
But many new issues arise which can add conflict when a girl marries a westerner or a male that is perceived to be wealthy. These are undesirable traits that occur and a man has to be careful, this will prove that you are a lower priority to her. Large sums of money disappear from your savings, when he questions it, he finds out she needed to loan money to family or friends in an emergency (with no thoughts of repayment). She prefers to be in her family home than yours, her family and friends abuse your hospitality by staying at your home and eating your food without any reimbursement of any kind.
How will the western man's family react to your marriage
I know of three western mothers of men who married an Asian woman. (I include my own mother to this, sorry mom, but these issues are going to be made public). Many families will react with hesitation because of fear. Fear because of misconceptions and the unknown.
Many misconceptions are: that the new bride will steal all your money, that the new mother-in-law will completely control your entire life, that the family is using you just as a paycheck, the new bride is controlling and is changing the way the son acts and interacts with his family, the new bride is just looking for a green card and will leave the man broken hearted and alone once she has the green card, etc.
Now not all the misconceptions will be unfounded. Many times your family is looking out for the best for you. But the best way to see what is going on is to make many friends in Asia and see how they react to your future bride, they will be much better judges, knowing what is culture (or cultural conflict) and what is not good. Many times the girl will act saintly around your family, but not around your friends, they may let something slip in their native language.
When should you get married?
Many times a marriage is forced because of pressures of family for a better life. The girl does not like the man, but because the family sees it as a paycheck, she will get into a loveless marriage. If you have any hesitations or problems, marriage will not cure them, marriage is not a cure to problems, it just hides them for awhile as both of you are busy getting ready for the wedding.
What problems will occur?
Most problems will occur due to cultural and language differences. Many times both the man and the woman in a couple will assume that their partner will react in a way similar to their culture and get upset when they do something different. You both have to accept and learn about each other's culture and way of life. Language will be another problem, since you and her will be speaking a second language, not all words or concepts of words will be exact. So what you say or what she says, may be upsetting. The solution is to be patient, speak slowly, and make sure everything is understood.
Any other problems occur because of your or her priority to the household, family, or work.
Again marriage or a child is not a solution, so if you think something like that will happen, then think again. If in doubt then don't do it.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Alcohol in Vietnam
For alcohol that is local to Vietnam, there are only three types: rice spirits, red wine and beer.
Red Wine
The red wine is simple and sweet and all of it comes from the mountains of Dalat. If you are looking for the complex flavorful wines. Then you will spend too much money for something from Europe or Australia. Red wine, Scotch, and Cognac are not enjoyed, even by most of the people who buy it and drink it, it is more a status symbol to show off wealth and status.
Rice Wine
The rice wine of Vietnam is a bit different that what you see in Japan, Korea, or China. It is more traditional. Many will buy the basic rice wine then flavor it in a jar with other ingredients. You can also buy the wine with the other ingredients inside. Some of the ingredients are scorpions, cobras, herbs, spices, and roots. The rice wine flavor is not as shattering and jarring as Chinese rice wine, but it is not smooth like Korean or Japanese rice wine.
It is something you should try, we will have some available, but it will never, ever be forced upon you.
Beer
The majority of people drink beer in Vietnam. The three most popular brands are Tiger (from Singapore), Heineken (from the Netherlands), and 333 (from Vietnam). All three pretty much taste similar, but they are okay to drink.
It is hot, so hot that by the time you drink your beer, it will be lukewarm. So it is traditional to drink your beer with a large chunk of ice in it. Because of this, mostly the beers will be lighter lagers.
Other good beers (but not popular) in Vietnam are: Halida (a VN beer that is made under the supervision of Carlsberg), Saigon Beer (there is a Ha Noi beer also, but not as good), LaRue (a beer made from French recipes and supervision), and BGI (Bloody Good Idea, a beer made by the supervision of Australians).
Saigon is the only one that comes in three labels: red, white, and green. Red label is the most popular, it is a light lager reminiscent of Tiger, Heineken, and 333. White label has a better taste, and is also known as Saigon green, because it is in a green bottle. The third and the best tasting and the least popular is green label or special. It is in a green bottle and a green label. It is very nice, but hard to find.
When coming to VN, beer is a good addition to a meal. Most Vietnamese food tastes better with beer.
But if beer is not an option. There are other things to drink.
Red Wine
The red wine is simple and sweet and all of it comes from the mountains of Dalat. If you are looking for the complex flavorful wines. Then you will spend too much money for something from Europe or Australia. Red wine, Scotch, and Cognac are not enjoyed, even by most of the people who buy it and drink it, it is more a status symbol to show off wealth and status.
Rice Wine
The rice wine of Vietnam is a bit different that what you see in Japan, Korea, or China. It is more traditional. Many will buy the basic rice wine then flavor it in a jar with other ingredients. You can also buy the wine with the other ingredients inside. Some of the ingredients are scorpions, cobras, herbs, spices, and roots. The rice wine flavor is not as shattering and jarring as Chinese rice wine, but it is not smooth like Korean or Japanese rice wine.
It is something you should try, we will have some available, but it will never, ever be forced upon you.
Beer
The majority of people drink beer in Vietnam. The three most popular brands are Tiger (from Singapore), Heineken (from the Netherlands), and 333 (from Vietnam). All three pretty much taste similar, but they are okay to drink.
It is hot, so hot that by the time you drink your beer, it will be lukewarm. So it is traditional to drink your beer with a large chunk of ice in it. Because of this, mostly the beers will be lighter lagers.
Other good beers (but not popular) in Vietnam are: Halida (a VN beer that is made under the supervision of Carlsberg), Saigon Beer (there is a Ha Noi beer also, but not as good), LaRue (a beer made from French recipes and supervision), and BGI (Bloody Good Idea, a beer made by the supervision of Australians).
Saigon is the only one that comes in three labels: red, white, and green. Red label is the most popular, it is a light lager reminiscent of Tiger, Heineken, and 333. White label has a better taste, and is also known as Saigon green, because it is in a green bottle. The third and the best tasting and the least popular is green label or special. It is in a green bottle and a green label. It is very nice, but hard to find.
When coming to VN, beer is a good addition to a meal. Most Vietnamese food tastes better with beer.
But if beer is not an option. There are other things to drink.
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